Sherlock: Harry Watson - clearly a family member who’s given you his old phone. Not your father, this is a young man’s gadget. Could be a cousin, but you’re a war hero who can’t find a place to live. Unlikely you’ve got an extended family, certainly not one you’re close to, so brother it is. Now, Clara. Who’s Clara? Three kisses says it’s a romantic attachment. The expense of the phone says wife, not girlfriend. She must have given it to him recently – this model’s only six months old. Marriage in trouble then – six months on he’s just given it away. If she’d left him, he would have kept it. People do – sentiment. But no, he wanted rid of it. He left her. He gave the phone to you: that says he wants you to stay in touch. You’re looking for cheap accommodation, but you’re not going to your brother for help: that says you’ve got problems with him. Maybe you liked his wife; maybe you don’t like his drinking.Power connection - tiny little scuff marks around the edge of it. Every night he goes to plug it in to charge but his hands are shaking. You never see those marks on a sober man’s phone; never see a drunk’s without them. There you go, you see – you were right.
Taxi Driver: Get out me car
It’s Monday again. Do you need a pick-me-up? Have some hilarious quotes from The Lego Movie. You’re welcome and everything is awesome.
I AM YOUR PERSONAL ART CHEERLEADER I LOVE ART FRIENDS
i will always reblog this
If angels really like this I’m going to cry….
There may come a day when I will not reblog this.
Today is not that day.
This is so perfect!
Let’s try this out
how badly did it hurt your soul to draw the “after” images?
Gayle King is such an ass that’s so rude she really said “blah blah blah”??
If you think about it potatoes don’t really get all that much credit
they’re fucking awesome
this one thing here
can be made into:
different variations of fries
It can be made into chips
you can make hashbrowns with it
even a salad
add some fuckin cheese to those potatoes
you can have it sliced and diced
you can make tater tots
hell you can even eat the skin
or just have little potato nuggets
thank u potatoes
guys… it’s a palm tree.
ten inch dick aka longer than my forearm
i know there are some writers who follow me
I believe the average is 6 inches? The longest is 14, an he suffers dizziness when he gets a boner, and even though he’s heterosexual, he can only have sex with men (or anally with women) as his cock can’t fit in a vagina.
So writers, take note.
jesus h. christ
I once had a boyfriend who was quite well-endowed, and that was some painful, annoying shit right there (especially with a selfish dude who didn’t really think about that/blamed me for being “tiny,” what the fuck). The average vagina is 3-4 inches deep, though some women may have a depth of 6-7 inches.
Of course, a lady’s Sarlaac Pit is designed to accomodate rather large things. That does not, however, mean that it is comfortable or fun to have those large things in your hermetically-sealed shame basket, not to mention have it ramming repeatedly against your cervix. Ow fucking ow.
Contrary to popular belief, bigger is NOT ALWAYS BETTER.
A rectum can be between 5-7 inches deep. A pliable dildo could push past that, taking that sharp curve into the large intestine, if you’re patient and flexible and you have a lot of lube at your disposal. And you don’t mind things being in your INTESTINES, oh my God. A hard dick, however, that isn’t so bendy, would be another story entirely.
So if you’re shooting for realistic sex and your bottom isn’t into pain, you may want to reconsider giving your top anything over 7-8 inches of dick. 10+ inches might sound awesome but like Communism, for most people at least, it’s better in theory than it is in practice.
This very NSFW and TMI-imbued post brought to you by all the fucks I do not give.
Oh and if anyone accuses me of kink shaming I will find you and I will skin you.
ive learned a lot today omg
i think the last of my innocence just got killed reading this
I reblogged this yesterday but I just have to reblogg again for ^
#huge dicks are like communism
can someone please put that on a shirt
4 guys from school do the Mean Girls dance.
Ive never seen anything quite so perfect
i forget men can move their bodies like this
these guys are fucking amazing
"what’s a queen without her king?" well, historically, better
also, in the british monarchy, if a queen is on the throne, there isn’t a king. her husband is a prince. BUT if a king is on the throne, his wife is a queen. which truly shows that the country can be ruled without a king but can’t without a queen.
what is this
I hope this gets explained
Science side of tumblr, explain!
If you went or know anyone who went to SDCC and saw this cosplayer, the police seriously need your help. _
The cosplayer was found at the side of a road unconscious and bloody without her ID and in her costume. The police are unsure what happened to her.
If you have ANY information or saw her anywhere, call The San Diego Police Department at (619) 531-2000 or (858) 484-3154.
PLEASE Spread the message.
Personal note: I am not personally involved with the situation, I have not been to that con nor seen the cosplayer only saw the issue being raised on Facebook, so I’m raising more awareness on here. More infomation: x
Reblogging in hopes this case get solved fast!
come on tumblr this needs more notes
THIS IS MY FRIEND MILLY! SHE’S IN THE HOSPITAL IN ICU STILL IN SAN DIEGO WITH SEVERE BRAIN BLEEDING. PLEASE reblog this and let the police know if you have any information!
So it’s my birthday and I’m opening gifts. I open the wrapped box from my uncle.
I open the box, and find a $50 gift card, yes? But wait, there’s Styrofoam. There’s more.
Then I remove the Styrofoam…
A FUCKING LEGLESS LEGO LEGOLAS
mY UNCLE GOT ME A LEGLESS LEGO LEGOLAS
bEST BIRTHDAY GIFT EVER
he then later gave me the legs.
LEGO LEGOLAS’ LEGO LEGS
Are you Luna Lovegood
Loony Luna Lovegood Lavishly Loving LEGO Legolas’s LEGO Legs